During a news story about obesity, Artie told Howard that he was obese. Howard didn't think that Artie was obese and asked him why he thought he was obese. Artie said that in to be considered obese, you have to be 100 pounds overweight. He than said that a man who is 5'9" should weigh around 185. Artie said that he weighed over 300 pounds. Howard than asked if Artie was morbidly obese and although he denied it, Fred said that anyone overweight by more than 100 pounds is morbidly obese.

Artie said that in order to lose the weight he needs to lose, he has to switch habits back to cocaine.

Good thinkin' man. You should start tonight in Vegas!