Hey Retard!

Howard asked everyone in the studio this morning, "Gun to your head, who would you rather be... Gary the Retard or Eric the Midget?'
Robin and Artie Lange both answered Gary because he's too retarded to know the difference.
Fred answered Eric because the midget at least had some intellect.
And after Howard pondered his decision, he went with Gary the Retard because he couldn't be trapped in Eric the Midget's body.

Kendra calls in!

Eric's girlfriend Kendra and his best friend Johnny Frato both called in today to talk about their relationship.
Howard got Kendra to admit that she wasn't dating Eric, she wasn't in love with Eric and that she wasn't sexually attracted to Eric. Trying to get Kendra to admit when she will meet Eric was like pulling teeth. Kendra explained that they were "friends" and could possibly become more than that. Johnny Frato kept on bringing up Vern Troyer for some reason and everyone agreed that Eric the Midget is no Vern Troyer. They all made a bet that Kendra wouldn't be meeting Eric, but they scrapped the bet because Kendra could control the bet. Kendra dropped off the call, and Eric got back on. The tiny little freak's head almost exploded because he wouldn't admit defeat. Eric also wouldn't admit that he was wrong about Kendra not being on the show.
I love the fact that this chick was on the show and Howard won.
The best part of the segment was Fred playing Loser by Beck.


Click here to go to www.kendrassecret.com.
Click here to check out my last post about Kendra.

Artie humps the bed

During his stay at the Turning Stone Casino in Syracuse this weekend, Artie pulled an Eric the Midget. Artie told Howard that Lauren, the event coordinator at the hotel, was so hot that he had to masterbate to her. But instead of doing it the old-fashioned way, Artie humped the bed.
Howard was amazed at this story and asked Artie where he finished and Artie said on the sheets. Howard also asked if doing this irritated Artie's penis and he said no, thankfully the sheets were very soft. Howard also got Artie to reveal that he has done this before in the bed at a W Hotel.
Why didn't Artie just pay to have sex with this girl you ask??
Super-ASSistant Teddy got the scoop on Lauren and it turns out she's engaged.
This chick must be really hot to make Artie hump the bed and make out with a pillow!

Eric the Midget

Aka Eric the Retard
Aka Eric the Shithead
Aka Eric the Jackass
Aka Eric the Piece of Shit
Aka Eric the Worthless Piece of Shit
Called in AGAIN today and had absolutely nothing to say.
Eric also claims that his girlfriend Kendra is serious with him and not with Johnny Frato Jr.
To check out Eric's girlfriend (who has him as her 13th friend on myspace) go to www.kendrassecret.com.

This is Kendra telling Eric the Midget how she really feels about him. LOL.

Who gives a....

Store this in the Who Gives A Fuck Category....
Eric the Midget calls in everyday to promote some stupid website that he sits on all day. Is there another person in the world who goes to this site to chat with Eric the Asshole? If you have no life, go check out the Johnny Fratto Social Club website or JFSC.TV and talk to Eric.



I'm sure the conversation will be riveting!